Monthly Archives: April 2021

Hair

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Just as NY was the first to succumb to the pandemic, it seems we are the first hopefully seeing the light at the end of the tunnel.

This morning I am getting my hair done at my favorite salon. After 2 weeks of my second shot I was supposed to be highly immune to the worst of COVID-19 and the first thing I wanted to do was my hair. Not see old friends, go to a restaurant, party or concert, but do one of the things that I definitely cannot do well myself. Color and cut my hair!!! I diligently colored the gray regularly, don’t get me wrong. I didn’t let myself go, at least not completely, in the comfort of hiding at home. I even got one of those plastic guides to cut hair, especially for my daughter whose hair had grown so long it was literally uncomfortable for her. Yet, today when I arrived to the salon my favorite stylist couldn’t help herself in laughing with me about how bad the situation was.

She is still diligently making sure my color is pristine while I write on my phone, but I already feel like 10 years younger, if not more. The reflection in the mirror in recent weeks was making me feel sad. It was a clear contrast with pictures of my younger self that my phone widgets randomly pic to entertain me with. Gray, uneven, frizzy hair. The horror. I know that after she is done my hair will be again one of the things I have always liked about myself.

My mother has long, luscious hair. She spends a considerable amount of time styling it every day. I guess I got my love for hair from her. I am much more laid back but I still enjoy a good hair day. And today will be one!!! I am excited as you can feel. I am also grateful. My favorite salon didn’t close forever, and while my favorite restaurants are gone, it gives me a sense of comfort and normality I really needed.

There are other aspects of going back to normality that are giving me stress. I am not ready to go back to how things were, at least not 5 days a week. Just as the world economy needs to recover better and not just back to business as usual, I hope offices, schools, routine also return better, healthier. What are you looking forward to when this nightmare is finally over?

What is in a name?

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I have had many names. When I was inside my mother’s belly, my grandfather decided my name was Angela Maria, a combination of my parents names. Then, as an act of rebellion, they decided to legally call me Maria Angela.

Then came my difficulty at pronouncing my long composite name. Jamaria was the best I could do. Since then for my family I have always been Jamaria, Jamala, Jama, Jamarin, Jamarincito.

To be honest I never liked Angela Maria so much and Jama was not an acceptable alternative out in the world. My friends at school called me Angela. My foes made fun of Maria, the girl with long braids. I didn’t really mind much. My dream was to be Heidi, the girl of the prairie.

Then came my own rebellion. In college, I decided I was Mariangela. Not Maria Angela or Angela Maria or Angela, but Mariangela. This was and still is how I see myself.

After I moved to the US my name morphed again into Maria, Marie, Mary, Mari-Angele and other versions and pronunciations. By now, I am so used to the fluidity of it that I just invite people to call me the way it feels better for them. And I mean it.

This includes names I really love, like Angeline, Angelita, Angie, mi Angels, MA, Mangela and the best, of course: Mama.

I know how important a name is for a person. According to Carnegie, in his still relevant classic book about human nature, the name is one of the most cherished things a person has. It is recognition. It is identity and value.

Since reading that book I have been thinking a lot about names and actually started to try to be better at remembering then. It is not easy for me, but it feels good to try. Relating names to stories, writing down details, like the pros do.

But please forgive if I momentarily blank when I run into you in the corridor. Oh, wait, that doesn’t happen anymore. We now have video calls…

So what is in a name? Is it part of you? Is it a reflection of yourself? How can it become so important when it is your parents’ decision when you are born?How do you feel about your name? Did you wish your name was Margaret Tatcher? I did as a little girl…

Until the end of the world

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Movies and music used to be an important part of my life. I used to hang out with cool friends that could speak for hours about Win Wenders and obscure soundtracks. I never knew too much about those myself but I guess I brought other things to the conversation. Fascination for example, and endless curiosity.

Courtesy of the pandemic we now have access to all streaming channels available. This includes Criterion. And yes, I finally got to watch the movie with such a great title and amazing soundtrack. It turns out that the soundtrack was more successful than the movie. I can see how excruciating it would have been to watch it at the movie theater. At home, with pauses for life and sleep, it is a 5-hour masterpiece of imagination and travel.

It got me thinking about art and artsy people that spend their lives following their passion and making a name for themselves. I admire their courage and dedication. So much to say about their time and understanding of the world. I am not sure much will be left to reminisce about in 50 years. Maybe I am already too old to appreciate new trends, but somehow I doubt tiktok will pass the test of time.

That takes me to reading. For years I have felt guilty and sad about only reading for work. I reminisce of the summers at my grandparents farm, laying in a hammock and devouring book after book. It is difficult to replicate that sense of eternity and lack of urgency that allows you to just embody the story the characters are going through. It also takes good writing. And that is as precious as gold.

I am very partial to certain authors and styles. I guess coming from the country of Macondo I was destined to enjoy the so-called Literatura Fantastica. Cien años de soledad and La casa de los espiritus are my all time favorites. I think it is also about timeless families and stories. I couldn’t get enough from Guadalcanal and now from Largo Petalo de mar.

I am not sure any of those will be the same in English. Each language has its own music and very rarely have I enjoyed a literary translation. Yet, I guess if you don’t know the original language it doesn’t matter. So if you have a chance I encourage you to try some Isabel Allende, Garcia Marquez, Benedetti, William Ospina, and let yourself go.